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about the webmistress

There’s so much more about this smile. You just don’t know. This is the web portal of a fifteen-year-old feline who grew whiskers and paws. As much as she loves dwelling in her solemn, gloomy little own world – she is also thought to be a nonsensical and ill-mannered child who eats anything but food.

Yo. It’s Rachee.

Rachelle Angeli B. Marañon for short. HAHA. I love purple. I accept friends and comments. I laugh, I love, I shop, I cry. I do everything I want; I’m still young, wild and free. I know my boundaries, mistakes and flaws. I spill secrets. I’m bubbly. I’m not aiming for the perfect me but the better me. I do what’s right or maybe wrong, but I still make of it. I laugh at myself if I did something silly. I can control my temper and everything that should be controlled. Everyone knows that life is crazy but wonderful. It can be unfair, but not at all times. I can be your worst enemy or best friend. I am weird, but not that simple. I have realized something that I should have been realizing earlier, still seeking for true friends and for my knight in shining armour. Patiently waiting and I wish they’ll come sooner or later. I don’t believe at love at first sight, nor at times even at true love. Everyone has an individual ability to make a person happy, and I can make you happy, but sometimes I can make you cry. Some people hate me but I don’t mind them because they’re insecure. I take many pictures. I had swollen my pride; my past memories are still treasured. You are welcome in my heart and I swore I won’t forget you. Keep that curve on your face; keep smiling!

Xoxo,
Gossip Girl

♥ Rachee

cyber diary

2/02/2012

Thursday, February 2, 2012

2/02/2012

To the man I will love someday

Dear you,

At age sixteen, it is somehow hilarious to say that I've already had my heart "broken" many times. It's true, though. At this young age, I have been disappointed by the male species a little more than a few times. However, I don't let these petty heartbreaks ruin me. I get hurt, of course. I even almost cried again last night when I remembered this one guy I really liked who, sadly, gave up on me. The thought of you and the faith that you exist, though, gives me hope. I may or may not have met you already, but I know, in my heart, that you are out there, somewhere.. and one day, I am going to finally find out that you are the one and the waiting will be worth it.

To be honest, the thought of my love life doesn't make me giddy at all. I'm not exactly successful in that arena. I have always wanted to believe that I can live without having to do anything with romantic love; that I'm too independent to have my happiness depend on someone else, much less a boy. No matter how hard I deny it, though, I know that when I meet you, I WILL depend on you. I will need you to be there for me because otherwise, I won't be there for me too. I will need you to survive my day-to-day life, every single second of it. I hate having to need someone in my life because it's an enormous insult to my pride, but you, I will need you. And that's because I will love you. I will love you like I've never loved anyone before. I will do everything to make you happy, even if it means risking my own happiness.

I will be your best friend. I will be there for you when you're sad. I will be there to listen to your qualms. I'll hold your hand, and I will never let go first. I'll look into your eyes and make you feel like you're the only guy that exists in my world. I will play your video games with you. I will sit on your passenger's seat when you want to feel in charge; I will drive for you if you're too tired to drive. I'll car race you. We'll play basketball... and football. I will go with you to the concerts of the artists and bands that you love the most. I will scream my lungs out with you during those concerts. We'll even go to Europe together. I've always wanted to go to Europe with you. If you want to go to Iraq, though, since guys usually want gun drama or whatever, I'll still go. Anywhere as long as I'll be with you.

I will sing to you, even if I know I have an awful voice. I will sing to you, and I will try to sing well, because you won't deserve anything but the best. I will cook for you. So far, I don't know how to cook anything, but for you, I will learn. I'll bake you cakes and cookies, and you're going to love them because they'll be a product of my love for you. I will help you with your homework, take goofy pictures with you, read to you my favorite book, watch a pile of DVD's with you, be beside you during the mass, walk by the beach with your hands laced on mine... My parents and friends will love you because they're going to see how happy I truly am when I'm with you.

But don't get me wrong. I'm not going to strangle you and give you a romance overkill. I will understand that you need time with your friends, and I'm going to give that to you. You can still go to night outs with the boys, and you can have your getaways with them, and it's going to be alright with me because I will trust you. You will give me the most genuine of smiles, and for that, all I'd ever want is your happiness. Alongside that is my own.

Now, I sit alone in my room, as I think about you and how amazing and happy we are going to be. And I won't even demand a lot. All I'd ask for is for you to keep up with me: to not give up on me, like most of the other guys did. And that would be enough.

See you in the future!

Lovingly yours,

Rachee

Labels: hopeless romantic, love

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